Have I Got Something To Tell You

The Best of Jamie's Column: Have I Got Something To Tell You

Is it just me or am I the only one who is amazed at the kind of tales people share about others behind
their backs? Not saying that in my 38 years of breathing, I've never partaken in a whisper here and there
about something I may hear in passing. As humans I suppose it is our nature. It doesn't make it right, but
we tend to love that excuse for most of our shortcomings and negative behavior.

"I'm only human!" It isn't that talking amongst ourselves is a bad thing when discussing other people; it's
what the intent is behind what we are saying that causes the most harm. Are we sharing something
newsworthy or updating someone on the lives of others, or are we deliberately spreading gossip,
deliberately trying to damage the name and reputation of another? Probably one of the greatest universal
spiritual laws is what we put out in consciousness, what we do, what we speak, and especially what we
think, comes back to mirror who and what we are. When we intentionally set out to cause pain or
damage to another individual we immediately set in motion the law of cause and effect. That which we
do to or against another will be done unto us. Now, I don't know about you, but that usually causes me to
stop and think twice before starting to paint a damaging picture of someone for the sheer pleasure of
causing pain and turmoil. I will be the first to admit that I have not always been impeccable with my
words, I have not always thought twice before I spoke my truth about another. The key here is "my truth",
not "the truth"; there truly is a difference. "My truth" applies to me and me alone. "The truth" comes from
learning that there is always another part of a story that we may not be fully aware of. We cannot always
know the hows and whys of situations that do not involve us. We can be more responsible and seek the
truth before we begin our tirade of unsure-truths and outright gossip.

People have always talked about me, some good things and some not so good. I've become accustomed
to this especially in the last few years. There has been more gossip and talk about me since I've become
a minister than there ever was from the kids in school growing up. So you guessed it, most of the talk
comes from within the ranks of the "spiritual community", the very people who claim to know better than
to participate in such behavior. Does it hurt me? Some of their words do, while other comments roll off
with little attention given to them or the person from which they came. What hurts the most is when what
has been told is not only not true, but also harmful. The idea of someone purposely telling lies on another
has always boggled my mind. Of course the truth will always be revealed in time, but the damage to
one's spirit and emotional well-being is something we may never fully understand. For myself, I diligently
work on learning to love and appreciate who I am. There are days I truly do believe in my self worth and
my connection to God as one of his wonderful creations. But there are days where I forget my truth; I
forget that no one can take my light, my spiritual power from me. It is painful when people talk about you
and speak unkindly and venture to tell stories that hold no truth in them. It is sad to think that people who
come and hug us and tell us how much we mean to them will go behind our backs and say horrible
things they would not say to our face.

Trying to understand the reasons one would choose to act in such a manner can teach us compassion,
forgiveness and self-reflection. Where have I gossiped, where have I said words that caused pain to
another? Was it something I did on purpose? Was it something I did blindly? Owning our "human-ness"
can be very uncomfortable when we do it with an open heart. Learning to see ourselves through the eyes
of truth often times will lead us down a road to cleansing and healing of emotional issues and behaviors
we have ignored or tried to conceal from the light of spiritual understanding. Why do we do the things we
do? Is it insecurity; is it jealousy, fear, lack of compassion and love for others, or just plain meanness?
When we listen to the vicious tales about others we are just as guilty as the one spreading the stories.
When we stand and listen to someone berate or beat down another and know that it is not the truth and
say nothing, it is as if we did the injustice ourselves. If you hear gossip, ask the person if they know this to
be the truth. Disarm hate with truth and love. Stand firm in the light of truth when others gather in a mob
to attack someone who is not there to defend their honor and integrity.

There have been people who at one time loved and respected me, had me speak at their churches quite
frequently. When they called for my services, I always went. It took the gossip of one individual, who at
one time said she cared greatly for me, to damage me in the eyes of others. I was shocked, I was
offended but more than anything else, I was hurt deeply. How could one be swayed so easily? I pray for
the wisdom of Spirit to help me know how to discern who people are as individuals and not who they are
according to the opinions and experiences of others. When I become upset over actions such as these, I
pray and meditate and ask for guidance. Spirit lovingly reassures me that all will be made right in time
and the truth will be made known. I am reminded in those moments of hurtful reflection to simply "follow
me." In these comforting words from Spirit I find my strength to endure and carry on. Know who you are
when others bash your character, know who you are and who you are not when they tell the world whom
they believe you to be. Is it enough to know oneself when there are those who whisper your name in the
shadowy world of gossip and jealousy? You betcha'! Until next month, live in the joy and wholeness of
who you are and keep spreading "The Light."

Jamie Sanders is an ordained New Thought minister ordained through The Barbara King School of
Ministry in Atlanta, Georgia and The World Federation of Unity Churches. He has been the producer and
host of his own weekly television program, "Positive Living" and is an active speaker, workshop facilitator
and performer for Unity Churches, retreats and other New Thought organizations. He is a featured
columnist for "The Light", "Kaleidoscope" and "Alternatives" magazine and currently resides in Fort
Walton Beach, Florida. For more information on available dates for speaking or for correspondence you
can email him at Jamie1118@aol.com or visit his official web site and join his online mailing list at
wwwjamiesanders.com.